Heaven would be absolute hell…for anyone who…

What sort of moron longs for totalitarian rule…?

A typical day in heaven…

  • 6-8am: how to master the genuflect…
  • 8-10am: grovel like you mean it…
  • 10-12pm: so you’re tone deaf. Just mouth the words instead. No one will ever know…
  • 12-2pm: broaden your adulation vocabulary…Word’s he’ll love…
  • 2-4pm: Know when to praise…know when to worship…
  • 4-6pm: How to distract yourself from missing sex…beer…free time…solitude…sleep…your loved ones in hell (tell yourself he’s torturing them because he loves them)…
  • 6pm-6am: hard core worship (alternate days, praise)…

repeat…forever…!